My oldest son will be twelve years old in a couple months. That’s old enough that we should have had more sensitive subject talks sooner than now. Unfortunately, we have put it off. I guess I’ve been the head-in-the-sand kind of mom without realizing it. We have used the real words for private parts since the boys were small, but that’s pretty much the extent of our openness.
My boys are on the Autism spectrum, and sometimes, I don’t know if we have communication issues because of that, or just because they are boys.
My boys are extremely private. My oldest has been locking the bathroom door since he was eight. They get embarrassed over many things that most boys joke about. Again, not sure if it’s an Autism issue, or just plain who my boys are. Their father is also extremely private.
So I was really excited to get an advanced copy of the book “Changes” by Luke and Trisha Gilkerson. It’s the second in their “The Talk” series. The first was more about sex; birds and the bees, etc. We haven’t gone through that one yet, though we need to soon. Changes focuses more on puberty. I liked the idea of having an open and read script but being able to add in personal dialogue. It helps with the awkwardness a bit.
They wanted to cry. They wanted to hide. They wanted to joke. They wanted to yell. They just plain did not want to do it. They did a bit better when their dad did it with them, but they still joked a bit too much. So I found going through the book extremely uncomfortable with my boys.
I think though, that now that the dialogue is more open, it will be easier for them (and us). I don’t think it will ever be an easy or pleasant topic, but at least they know it’s something they can talk about with us.
Changes is a Biblical perspective on puberty. I appreciate this, and this is the only type of perspective I’m interested in. Though some would consider the Bible outdated, as a Christian, it’s still my most trusted resource.
I have to be honest. I don’t remember having a talk with my parents. Maybe we had a talk and it wasn’t significant enough to recall. I happened to be in public school in 7th grade, so I do remember a bit of stuff in health class (I also remember being excused from some parts of said health class).
I’m so thankful for Luke and Trisha and their wonderful Biblically based resources! I know that these topics are so important, and ones that might have been avoided completely if not for products like this.
Acne. Pubic hair. Breasts. Squeaky voices. Menstruation. Nocturnal emissions. Make no mistake, puberty can feel like an awkward time in a child’s life. But with the right perspective, children can be taught to anticipate puberty as a blessing. Changes is a series of 7 studies, anchored in the Scriptures, that helps parents talk meaningfully with children about the mental, emotional, and physical changes puberty brings. Changes was written for parents to read with children ages eight to twelve years old. The study supplies children with a Bible-based understanding of puberty in a language they can understand.
Here’s what’s discussed in Changes:
Lesson 1 Just Like Jesus- Growing in Wisdom and Stature
Lesson 2 Puberty- Just one of Many Changes
Lesson 3 Hormones-The Catalyst of Change
Lesson 4 Girls and Boys- Changes We Can Both Expect
Lesson 5 Girl Changes- Becoming a Woman
Lesson 6 Boy Changes- Becoming a Man
Lesson 7 Changes in Desire- The Goodness of Sexual Attraction
I’m also looking forward to the last book in the series, Relationships, due to come out in 2016. I recommend Changes. It opened up topics I’d never discuss without it. Even though we had a few roadblocks, I think it’s a wonderful, helpful book. I’m looking forward to going through it again with the boys to become more comfortable with a very difficult issue.