It was a quiet Sunday afternoon, and we were doing the usual things to prepare for the week. I was in the kitchen washing dishes when I heard a loud crash.
My husband had fallen from a ladder in the next room!
Knowing how high the ladder was, my mind immediately started racing. A flood of ‘what-ifs’ rushed over me. What if he’s seriously injured? What if he has to go to the hospital? What if the worst has happened?
Thankfully he was okay – just a bruised ego and a cut toe. But this one incident made me pause.
As the fear subsided, I walked away from this experience feeling grateful. Sure, I was grateful that he wasn’t badly hurt, but even more so, I was simply grateful for HIM. It made me realize that maybe, just maybe, I had been taking him for granted.
Friends, it doesn’t have to take a scary moment to put things into perspective for us. We can pause right now and consider how to appreciate our husbands. How can we show them that they’re important to us? How can we make them feel significant again?
I know some of you might be thinking that making your husband feel special is just one more thing to add to your ever-growing to-do list. Where can you possibly find time in your day? And by the way, shouldn’t it be the other way around? What is he going to do to make YOU feel special?
Before we get ahead of ourselves, let us start by addressing the heart.
When we put our husbands low on the totem pole, we lose sight of a key biblical principle.
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
In fact, the bible reminds me that my husband should be considered even more significant than me! It’s a tough pill to swallow but that’s what my bible says. And it doesn’t stop there. The scripture goes even further to say that I need to look beyond my own interests to consider his. Wow!
Yes, I’m speaking to myself here. I know how very easy it is to leave my husband for the last, especially at the end of a hectic day, week, or month. You get the picture. Let’s just say I’m guilty of this more times than I’d like to count. So let’s help each other out.
Here are 5 practical tips we can try today to give our husbands the attention they deserve and make them feel significant again.
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Men have the sometimes unfortunate reputation for not being big talkers and this is true for many men. Having said that, the times when he does have something to say, please be sure to listen. Every now and again you might find a nugget worth treasuring. What’s on his heart? What are the things that are important to him? When I stop long enough to listen, I find clues about how to make him feel special.
- Speak his love language
Remember it’s not about the way you want to feel loved, but instead what works for him. Does he need words of affirmation or is he the physical touch kinda guy? What does he need to feel loved?
- Support his interests
Find what he likes and do it with him (if he’s okay with that) or just give him the space to do it. My husband loves football and I’ve never been a football fan. But 12 years of marriage have taught me that sometimes I’ve just gotta get into the game and cheer along with him.
- Keep the house tidy (okay, ‘clean’)
Having an untidy house is one of those things that can drive anyone mad. And while we could spend some time debating whose role it is to clean the house, for most of us our culture suggests that it’s primarily the wife’s role. Whatever your view on this just be sure to be on the same page with your husband in order to avoid any miscommunication. Plus it’s no fun trying to do a major spring cleaning in 15 minutes before company drops by.
Some of these things on this list might not work for you or your husband. One sure fire way to find out what will make him feel significant is to simply ask. Once you get the answer be prepared to follow through and actually do it.
To be sure I wasn’t being one-sided, I actually asked my husband for ideas for the above tips. You might even be able to guess which ones are his. 🙂
I hope you will try some of these tips and let me know how it goes. If you think that it’s unrealistic, maybe even impossible to make your husband feel significant again, you’re probably right. That is, if you’re trying to do so on your own strength. With God, however, all things are possible (Luke 18:27).
God wants nothing more than for our marriages to glorify him. He wants us to bless our husbands and make them a priority in our lives. If you’re not sure how to do this, take your concerns to God and pray for the strength and willingness to serve your husband. This is one prayer I’m sure he’ll willingly answer!
What about you?
What do you do to make your husband feel significant?
How can we be sure to keep our husbands high on our priority list, especially in the midst of busy seasons?
About the Author:
Marva has been married for 12 years and together with her husband has 2 school-aged kiddos. She’s lucky to live in one of the sunniest parts of the world, where most days feel like heaven on earth. For the other days, she finds comfort in a nice tall latte. You can find her on sunSPARKLEshine where she writes about celebrating everyday brilliance and living a life that sparkles. You can also visit her on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter and Instagram. Get the latest sparkle by signing up for her newsletter Sparkle Highlights here.